| so glad that jen went thru the whole thing with me. this time was a lot different than the past 2. by the time i got thru the front doors, i felt nauseous, light headed, and weak. my hands were quite cold and my face was pale with a tint of green. after much analysis, i've decided that the discomfort had resulted from a combination of severe deprivation of sleep + stress + standing in the cold for the stupid GO bus AND for stupid poo + the smelly guy who sat beside me on the bus + the odd/intensive odour that was on that bus. I was quite upset at myself, but after a hot shower and a good & lengthy nap, i've gotten over it and has continued to move on. of course, i'm still moving towards my goal, my theory is: if u can't regain your balance after a small stumble, u're not ready for life. sigh, i'm just mad at myself for not weighing out the costs and benefits during the last 3 mins. looking at the bright side of things, i know i've got what it takes and...if i need to wait another year, i can, and i will. why? it's something that i want. when u want something, u've got determination...meaning u don't give up easily. AIYAAAAA i still feel like kicking myself. that soap was PERFECT...perfect until i did that dumb thing. AIIIIII. looking at the good side of things (as always): i now know that i've got what it takes. i feel silly for not studying for the last 2...altho i didn't have the time to, but.....gee just imagine if i did O.o life would have been so different than what it is now. today i was late for work again! thank goodness the doctor was late and becuz i had given my key to another collegue, it made it look like Serine and I were on time, but were unable to go into the office becuz he was late. hahaha. after work, i went to see karina, my best friend from hillside. it's been a year since i last saw her, and hanging out with her is still a lot of fun. she's really easy going and it doesn't matter how long we don't see one another for...becuz it only takes seconds for the old feeling to come back! i see great talent in her and she too, has a dream. she only needs some encouragement to help build up her confidence, and i'm more than happy to be the one to give her that extra kick in the bum to get her towards that direction. friends are....givers of warmth, support, and inspiration. i've learned how to be a giver after being on the receiving end for so long....once again i thank i all my friends. tomorrow i'm going to drop off the wedding planner i brought for mandy. i think she'll be thrilled to see it....even tho it's a little late. but....yau sum ng pa late~~~ so tomorrow...i'm going back 'in there'. :\ don't like 'that place' and the ppl of 'that place'. last friday i tried to refund a textbook becuz according to the bookstore's policy u may refund a txtbook if u have: a receipt + book + course exemption letter. not my fault that i didn't get that letter until last week~ i already brought those 3 items in as soon as i got the letter. but that lady from the bookstore just had to give me a rough time for unidentified reasons...(becuz i'm azn???). she gave me a lecture on how i should have brought it in earlier becuz they had just sent off all the books back to the publisher worrrrrr. chi sin ga~ i was just there for a refund. she blamed me for making them pay an extra 17 delivery charge becuz i brought the book in 'late'! my fault becuz the school didn't give me the letter earlier? being slightly annoyed, i asked her 'so u want me to mail the book back to the publisher???' her response: 'no, just informing u of the situation...but then it's not your concern.' ....FAI YAN GONG FAI WA. fai yan then places my book on the palm of her hand and raises her voice at me: 'u expect the publisher to accept this book given the condition that it's in???'  i ....was astonished....to have someone question the condition of a txtbook that belonged to me. an UNTOUCHED txtbook that had been quietly sitting on my bookself all this time. i couldn't see what was wrong and seeing that she just wants to be a 'mix poo stick' i just told her my book was in perfect condition and waited to see what she wanted from me. to my surprise she handed the book to the cashier and told her to put in a refund and mumbles something about how i wouldn't care...which was true. i just wanted my $$$ back...stupid old lady. katrina says that i should have stood up for myself, and i told her becuz i didn't because i would have had to lower my integrity to the level of her's. LOL but that's only 1/4 of the real reason....i know my bad temper usually comes when i feel bullied (recall library or gas station inccident), but the real reason was becuz i was too sleepy + tired. if i had taken the book in tomorrow instead of last friday, it would have been quite different.
 so to stop my continuous rambling here: yes, i'm heading back to that wonderful place tomorrow.
|
heeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. had a good weekend.